September 22, 2015
What are we afraid of? There may be no rational answer to this question. There is nothing real to be afraid of! But we do feel fear in our human condition. We may even fear fear itself. But I think the Course is telling us we actually fear the truth about who we really are. We want to feel whole and complete, loved and loving, abundant and blessed. And guess what, we ARE all that and more. The fact we are all that and more is what terrifies us. We have spent a lifetime convincing ourselves and making an identity that contradicts who we really are. Crucial to that identity is that it is not whole or complete, not loved or loving and not abundant and blessed. We have believed this mistaken identity and adopted it as our own. We are so attached to it that we seek our true identity but believe it impossible to achieve.
The Course teaches us this:
Under the ego’s dark foundation is the memory of the One, and it is of this that you are really afraid. For this memory would instantly restore you to your proper place, and it is this place that you have sought to leave. Your fear of attack is nothing compared to your fear of love. You would be willing to look even upon your savage wish to kill the One’s Child (you true Self), if you did not believe that it saves you from love. For this wish caused the separation, and you have protected it because you do not want the separation healed. You realize that, by removing the dark cloud that obscures it, your love for your Creator would impel you to answer Spirit’s Call and leap into Heaven. You believe that attack is salvation because it would prevent you from this. For still deeper than the ego’s foundation, and much stronger than it will ever be, is your intense and burning love of the One, and the One’s love for you. This is what you really want to hide. T-13.III.2.1-9
We are afraid of who we really are. We are afraid of the power and responsibility of being whole and complete, loving and generous. We have convinced ourselves we are not capable of such a feat when in reality that is second nature to who we really are and it takes no real effort to be that when we believe in the whole of who we really are in community as One.
Reality is never experienced alone – in separation. Who we really are is never experienced alone. Our true identity and nature is experienced in the Oneness of all Creation as One. We are all One. We cannot be separated. We are created One and in Oneness. Nothing can undo that fact. Only our willingness to believe we are something other than who we really are can we experience ourselves separate and vulnerable to any threat.
You have built your whole insane belief system because you think you would be helpless in the One’s Presence, and you would save yourself from the One’s Love because you think it would crush you into nothingness. You are afraid it would sweep you away from yourself and make you little, because you believe that magnitude lies in defiance, and that attack is grandeur. You think you have made a world the One would destroy; and by loving the One, which you do, you would throw this world away, which you would. Therefore, you have used the world to cover your love, and the deeper you go into the blackness of the ego’s foundation, the closer you come to the Love that is hidden there. And it is this that frightens you. T-13.III.4.1-5
We are simply afraid of losing this mistaken identity we have made and believe we are. Even though our true Identity is far greater that this little identity, we still cling to this little identity even when it doesn’t serve us. Our little identity has become the identity we are accustomed to and familiar with. It often doesn’t serve us well or at all, but we continue to cling to it and feed it. It’s now time to shift our attention and look at the Divine Identity within us that is real. This Identity includes all we encounter ad experience in our lives, each One and experience pointing us to the remembrance of who we really are and always have been and will be. Neither the past nor the future matter, for we are known to ourselves in the present moment. Be present right now and feel the Divine Presence we are in Oneness. Be not afraid, and let it be, just for this moment and eternity will take care of itself.
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